A Peeve-stipation Situation" post. Your thoughts, ideas and wisdom are not only sought but I am certain would be appreciated.
Hi B'Man (and others),
I'm a lurker on DD blogs, have been for a while now. This is my first comment! I really enjoy reading your blog and SugarAnne's as well. I'm not married, but I sometimes consider DD in the back of my mind when I think about marriage.
My question is: what happens when the wife is the one with all the pet peeves? Let's say you have these pet peeves about cleanliness and orderliness - you hope that SugarAnne wants to follow them not because you can spank her, but because they're important to you and she respects that. The spanking is just a tool that you can use to make it really happen. In my case, my boyfriend doesn't care as much about cleanliness, while I have enough pet peeves that you could run power plants off the steam that comes out of my ears. I know he would want to respect me and try to follow them, but I don't get any tools to enforce it. Isn't that unfair? If the HoH has the higher standards, he can enforce them. If the wife has higher standards, she has to lower them to those of the HoH?
To the Reader submitting the question:
Thanks for delurking and making a comment on the blog. I am submitting your question to the wider wisdom of the readership to which it was directed. I am hopeful that persons more qualified than I would render an opinion and that you will be able to distill the wisdom and glean what would work for you from the myriad of ways that your question is handled in other relationships.
I'm sure I have a peeve or two (or three) that ticks Sugar off but her temperament about these things are very different from mine. And that goes a long way toward harmony in our relationship. One thing is certain for me: the privilege of a Dd relationship with Sugar, and particularly her consent to be disciplined, instills and inspires in the deepest heart of me a desire to do better for her. Through Dd I have experienced a swelling up in me of a need to look out for her best interests; a stronger desire to care for her; a more passionate love for her; and an intense desire to keep her happy. I can't really explain it but a Dd relationship built on love, communication, trust and integrity would and should produce positive changes in both parties.